Sowing Seeds, Not Counterfeits

 Sowing Seeds, Not Counterfeits

“Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” — Proverbs 22:6

I. The Diagnosis: A Market of Masks

Let me tell you about a Saturday morning in Akasia that I will never forget. I was standing at the corner of Heinrich and Van Der Hoff, watching a young mother drag her son past the spaza shop. The boy maybe eight years old, in a school tracksuit that had seen better days was crying for a R5 lollipop. His mother, tired from a week of shifts at the factory, snapped: “Kry vir jou 'n lewe, my kind. Ek is klaar.” Get yourself a life, my child. I am finished.

That phrase haunted me all week. Get yourself a life. Not I will help you build one. Not Let us walk this road together. Just: figure it out. You are on your own.

Now, I am not here to judge that mother. Life in this country is hard. The cost of raising a child from birth to eighteen now pushes R3.2 million in South Africa. Many parents are exhausted, overwhelmed, and running on empty. The traditional parenting model has collapsed; decisions are now collaborative rather than authoritative, and children as young as eight are acutely aware of the pressures their parents face. Two out of every three people in this country are under thirty-five. We are a nation of young people being raised by tired people.

But here is the question that will not leave me: What are we actually sowing?

Every generation faces a marketplace of masks values counterfeited to look like virtue. The world sells self before sacrifice. It sells likes before love. It sells comfort before character. It sells followers before faithfulness. The algorithm has become the new oracle. The screen has become the new sanctuary. And parents good, well-meaning, struggling parents are being told that if they just give their children space, just let them find themselves, just don't impose anything, everything will work out.

That is a lie. And it is a counterfeit.

You see, counterfeit currency cannot purchase eternal reward. You can fill a child's pocket with fool's gold, but when the storm comes—and the storm always comes—that fool's gold will not buy a single moment of peace. It will not purchase character. It will not secure their soul.

II. The Investigation: What Does "Train Up" Actually Mean?

Let us define our terms with theological precision, because vague spirituality produces vague children.

The Hebrew word for "train up" is chanak. It does not mean "casually suggest." It does not mean "hope for the best." It means to dedicate, to initiate, to discipline, and to shape much like dedicating a house or setting apart a priest. It is an active, intentional, sweat-of-your-brow verb. It pictures a potter at the wheel, hands pressed into the clay, refusing to let the vessel collapse.

And "the way he should go"? The phrase is literally "his way" an individual, lifelong path designed by God, tailored to each child's unique God-given makeup. Not a cookie-cutter religion. Not a generic morality. A custom-designed path of righteousness, grounded in Scripture, guided by consistent, intentional parental discipleship.

The Scripture declares unequivocally: You are not raising consumers of culture. You are cultivating carriers of Christ.

Now, a common objection I hear in the townships and suburbs alike: "But Pastor, what about free will? What about when they grow up and make their own choices? You can't force a child to follow God."

You are correct. You cannot force. But you can form. You cannot control the harvest, but you can control what you plant. You cannot guarantee the outcome, but you can guarantee the input. The argument that "children will choose their own path" is not an argument for parental passivity; it is an argument for parental intensity. If they will choose, then let them choose from a menu of truth, not a buffet of lies.

The evidence from our own society is damning. We are seeing a "moral death spiral," with experts alarmed by corruption and leadership failures that have eroded public morality. Teen pregnancies spike over the holidays because, as one commentator put it, "Nothing is sacred in South Africa. It is a place and time where our morals are negotiable". The spirit of ubuntu that beautiful African conviction that "I am because we are" is facing mounting pressure from rising living costs and crumbling community structures.

And where does this moral decay begin? It begins in the home. It begins when parents outsource discipline to the state, expecting schools to instil values and government to teach morality. It begins when fathers are absent a crisis so severe in South Africa that missional parenting is now seen as a buffer against fatherlessness. It begins when we sow counterfeits and expect to harvest gold.

III. The Insight: Seeds, Not Counterfeits

Here is the truth that will rearrange your parenting: What you deposit in the dry season, they will withdraw in the storm.

Picture a farmer in the Free State. He has two bags of seed. One bag contains genuine maize—tested, proven, capable of surviving drought. The other bag contains look-alike seeds—cheap imitations that will sprout quickly but wither when the sun beats down. The farmer knows the dry season is coming. He knows the storms will test every root. Which bag does he sow?

Now answer me this: Which bag are you sowing into your children?

Because make no mistake the storm is coming. The storm of peer pressure. The storm of social media comparison. The storm of economic desperation. The storm of identity confusion. The storm of a world that will tell your child that their feelings are their truth, that their desires are their destiny, and that God is either optional or obsolete.

You cannot prevent the storm. But you can determine what your child's roots are anchored in.

I am reminded of the parable of the sower. Jesus Christ told us that the seed is the Word of God. But He also told us that the soil matters. Some seed falls on the path and is snatched away. Some falls on rocky ground and withers. Some falls among thorns and is choked. But some falls on good soil and produces a harvest—thirty, sixty, a hundred times what was sown【Mark 4:3-20】.

Parent, you are the soil-preparer. You are the one who breaks up the hard ground. You are the one who removes the stones and pulls out the thorns. You are the one who ensures that when the seed of truth is planted, it has room to take root.

And here is the paradox that will set you free: The most loving thing you can do for your child is to be unloved by them in the moment.

Now, I can hear the gasps. What? Unloved? Yes. Because love is not the absence of discipline. Love is the presence of direction. Love is not letting them do whatever they want; love is showing them what they need. The child who is never told "no" will eventually be told "no" by life—and life's "no" is far harsher than yours.

The Scripture declares: "Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him"【Proverbs 22:15】. This is not an endorsement of abuse; it is an endorsement of boundaries. It is an acknowledgment that children are born with a bent toward foolishness, and that wise parents apply loving correction to straighten that bent.

IV. The Embodiment: Practical Wisdom for South African Parents

Let me bring this down to the dust of Akasia, to the taxi ranks of Soweto, to the suburbs of Sandton, to the farms of the Karoo. Here is how you sow seeds, not counterfeits:

First, plant truth deeper than trends.

The world will tell you that relevance is the highest virtue. The world will tell you that you must keep up with the culture, that you must not be "out of touch," that you must let your children explore every ideology and every identity. But I tell you, the Word of God is not a suggestion; it is a foundation. It is not a menu of options; it is a rock of certainty.

Do you want to know why so many young people are abandoning the faith? It is not because they thought too much. It is because they were never given enough to think about. They were given slogans instead of Scripture. They were given feelings instead of foundations. They were given cultural relevance instead of eternal truth. And when the winds of the world blew, they had nothing to hold onto.

Plant the Word. Not just on Sunday. Not just at Christmas. Every single day.

Second, model mercy louder than the algorithm.

Your children are watching you. They are watching how you treat the domestic worker. They are watching how you speak about the taxi driver. They are watching how you respond when the electricity is cut, when the petrol price goes up, when the news is bad. They are watching whether your Christianity is a Sunday costume or a Monday conviction.

The "Fathers Matter" initiative is currently seeking to inspire one million South African fathers to be actively and positively involved in the lives of their children. Why? Because fatherlessness has become a national crisis. Because children who grow up without a father's presence are more likely to experience emotional distress, moral confusion, and spiritual displacement.

But here is the question for every father reading this: Are you present, or are you just nearby? Presence is not the same as proximity. You can be in the same house and still be absent. Presence means engaged. Presence means involved. Presence means showing up not just physically, but emotionally, spiritually, and intentionally.

Third, sow what you want to reap.

The law of the harvest is immutable: whatever a man sows, that shall he also reap【Galatians 6:7】. You cannot sow anger and reap peace. You cannot sow neglect and reap respect. You cannot sow worldliness and reap godliness. You cannot sow indifference and reap devotion.

The youth of this nation are crying out for something real. A study of ten thousand South African youth revealed that while making money is their top priority, family remains the strongest influence on their decisions. They are desperate for guidance, even when they pretend otherwise. They are hungry for truth, even when they consume lies. They are searching for fathers, even when they claim they don't need them.

Parent, you are the primary influence in your child's life. Not the school. Not the government. Not the church. Not the algorithm. You. And you will either sow seeds of truth or counterfeits of convenience.

V. The Call: Become a Faithful Sower

I close with this: God loves your child because of who they are, but He blesses them because of what they do. And what they do will be shaped by what you sow.

The Lord Jesus Christ said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these"【Matthew 19:14】. Notice that Jesus did not say, "Let the children figure it out on their own." He said, bring them to me. He said, do not hinder them. He said, the kingdom belongs to them.

Parent, you are the gatekeeper. You are the one who opens the door to the kingdom or closes it. You are the one who points the way or obscures it. You are the one who sows the seed or the counterfeit.

The question is not whether you are sowing. The question is what.

Every conversation is a seed. Every discipline is a seed. Every prayer is a seed. Every example is a seed. Every moment of patience, every word of encouragement, every act of love these are seeds that will grow into a harvest of righteousness.

And every moment of neglect, every word of anger, every act of hypocrisy these are counterfeits that will produce a harvest of regret.

Make no mistake: your children will become what you cultivate.

Prayer

Lord God Almighty, Maker of heaven and earth, Father of all nations.

I come before You as a sower. I confess that I have sometimes sowed counterfeits. I have been tired. I have been distracted. I have been selfish. I have let the world shape my children more than Your Word. Forgive me. Cleanse me. Restore to me the joy of intentional parenting.

Lord, make me a faithful sower. Let my home be soil where Your truth outlives every counterfeit. Let my words be seeds of life. Let my actions be rain on dry ground. Let my love be sunlight that draws them toward You.

I declare that I will not raise consumers of culture. I will raise carriers of Christ. I will plant truth deeper than trends. I will model mercy louder than the algorithm. I will sow what I want to reap.

And when the storm comes and it will come let my children stand. Let their roots be deep. Let their foundations be sure. Let their faith be unshakable.

In the mighty name of Jesus Christ, my Lord and my Redeemer,

Amen.

Final Word

Parent, hear me: You are not alone in this.

The God who formed your child in the womb is the God who will guide them through the world. The Christ who died for their sins is the Christ who will intercede for their souls. The Spirit who convicted your heart is the Spirit who will convict theirs.

Trust God. Sow truth. And watch the harvest.

"Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it."

— Proverbs 22:6

From Akasia, Pretoria, with a sower's hope and a father's heart,

Harold Mawela